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00:00:00
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Beginning of the episode
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00:01:46
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- Servo, dressed as cheerleader
- Gimme an 'S'!
- Mike
- No.
- Servo
- Gimme an 'A'!
- Crow
- Hmm, no.
- Servo
- Gimme a 'T'!
- Mike
- Nuh-uh.
- Sevo
- Well, come on, you gotta give me something.
- Crow
- Well, technically, we don't, really.
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00:05:37
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- Mike
- It's a Giant Spider Invasion of Savings, at Menards!
Menards is a chain of home improvement stores in the Midwestern United
States.
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00:05:54
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- Servo
- Special, but unknown guest star!
- Crow
- How can you have a guest star in a movie?
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00:06:15
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- Mike
- It was executive produced, at least there's that...
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00:11:21
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- Mike, referring to the hick family
- You know, they're poor only in money... and sprit, and dignity, and
moral fiber, and hygiene.
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00:11:50
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- Mike
- The movie that takes the bold step of NOT including the audience.
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00:15:04
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- Sherrif
- No ma'am, I don't have the number.
- Servo
- Take your time, movie...
- Sherrif
- All I can tell ya is, use the Yellow Pages. Let your fingers do the
walking! *laughs out loud at himself*
- Crow, as if speaking of a disclaimer
- Not a joke, but an incredible simulation.
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00:15:31
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- Mike
- Hello? Movie? Here movie! Here boy! (whistle, whistle)
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00:16:36
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- Mike
- And the movie ramps up the repulsion.
- Crow
- This movie hates us, doesn't it?
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00:16:53
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- Crow, as a clean character walks into scene
- A showered person, thank God.
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00:19:32
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- Mike
- Ahh, the bright promise of a disgusting new character.
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00:24:59
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- Dr. Langer, in a grizzled voice
- I'm so glad you're here Doctor. I'm Jenny Langer.
- Crow
- Smoker... Coffee Drinker...
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00:25:57
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- Crow
- Such a nice day and they're wasting it making this movie...
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00:27:23
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- Servo
- Shot on location in Mrs. Herberger's biology class!
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00:28:45
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- Female Hick
- *screams* (after seeing severed cow head)
- Mike
- GOT MILK?!
The slogan of a well known US advertising campaign trying to get people
to buy more cow's milk.
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00:30:12
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- Male Hick
- You're so dumb, you wouldn't know rabbit turds from Rice Krispies.
- Crow
- Snap crackle poop.
Crow is referencing the Rice Krispies characters named
"Snap", "Crackle", and "Pop".
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00:32:07
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- Mike
- You know, this movie tested well with sexual predators.
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00:36:08
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- Sheriff
- Pardon me doctor. *flicks small spider from table*
- Servo, refereing to Alan Hale (Sheriff) being overwieight
- There's a crumb I didn't eat there.
- Sheriff, refering to the spider he flicked
- One of our local spiders. Heh heh.
- Crow
- So, it's stupid and smells of beer sweat?
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00:45:14
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- Female Hick to Husband
- You look like you could use a drink.
- Servo
- ...and a shower, and a job.
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00:45:50
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- Male Hick
- We can't let that sheriff come nosin' around here. What if he finds the
diamonds? ... And all that grass we're growing?
- Servo
- Lawns are illegal in Wisconsin??
Lawns are not illegal in Wisconsin. However, they seem to have a
problem with margarine.
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00:48:16
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- Crow singing
- I feel shaky, ohh so trembly... I've had whiskey and vodka and gin!
Crow is singing modified lyrics for the song "I Feel Pretty"
from West Side Story (1961).
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00:50:50
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- Crow
- It's morning in America. The back braces are a little sturdier...
- Servo
- The morning gin tastes a little smoother.
"Morning in America" was the slogan for Ronald Reagan's 1984
re-election campaign.
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00:51:58
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- Mike, as male hick hands cousin a diamond for inspection
- The diamond anniversary ring - tell her you'd marry her right out of
high school all over again.
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00:54:10
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- Servo
- The new 'Alan Hale Action Figure': He sits down, he snacks, he sits
down again, he farts, he drives, he comes with his own lunch!
- Mike
- Action Alan Hale and Action Alan Hale's Gut sold separately.
Alan Hale (1918-1990), american actor. Son of Errol Flynn sidekick Alan
Hale. Probably best known as the skipper on Gilligan's Island and
Sheriff Jeff Jones in The Giant Spider Invasion.
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00:58:06
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- Servo
- Mike, if I should slip into a coma during this movie, please, PLEASE,
do not take ANY extraordinary measures to revive me.
